Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Regarding Trash

Trash: What to Do With it

Ladies and gentlemen, this is a trash can.

The trash can is a docile creature that lives on a diet of useless non-recyclable refuse, and should be fed regularly. It also looks vaguely like a penis sometimes, but that’s not the point. If you have some trash in your hand, feed the can! Because when I find shit like this…

It makes me sad. And angry. Because it’s clear that some asshole just didn’t care if a poor trash can starved to death. He was probably walking along with his fancy hat and curly mustache, not even giving a single fuck if his garbage ended up on the ground, looking all gross and attracting ants and crows and unicorns and other hideous vermin.

Hey, douche. That can isn’t going to feed itself. Is it so hard to take 2—maybe 3—seconds of your time to prevent starvation?


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